Update on Last Custody Trial

Monday, December 28, 2009

Never, never take anything or anyone for granted.  I mentioned in my last post that I had completed my last custody trial for a client I had represented for 7-8 years.  After the trial was over and everyone had left the courtroom, I reached out my hand to shake my client's hand.  Instead of shaking my hand, we hugged and I held him as he started to sob in relief.  "I was so afraid I had lost her," he said in reference to his daughter. 
"She's yours forever now."   We both knew that there would be now more attempts by his ex-wife to take his daughter away and he could raise her now without threat of the court intervening again.

That's what we thought and that's what we planned. But one never knows. 

We never thought that just three weeks later, on his way home to his daughter from a wonderful new job for which they'd moved to Oregon, that my client, Bruce, would be killed in a head-on car accident.  We never anticipated that his daughter, for whom he fought so hard, would be returned to her mother after all and that his young sons would be left to clean up the estate. Or, that I would be helping them make sense of insensible things. 

I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to send Bruce an email or call him to discuss what he wanted done. And, how many times since hearing about this death I've thought how pointless our fight was and what a waste of valuable time it was. Time he could have spent with his daughter and other family members. 

So, hug your own loved ones and appreciate each moment you have with them. And, please, please, don't make the mistake of spending years of your life fighting over your loved ones. In the end, you may not have time to make it up to them. 
 
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